I have clung to a notion that everything happens for a reason, and was comforted somehow on that belief, that every time I experience difficulties in life, it happens for a better purpose, and that I wouldn’t be a better person if failure didn’t occur, but if everything happens for a reason then someone must have control over everything in my life, that I am destined to fail a relationship, fail an exam that I tried very hard to pass, or destined to win a lottery ticket that I only bet once in my life, because hey everything happens for a reason, so do I really have my own choice? do I really have the freedom to choose which path I want to be, in this case, what’s the point of free decision-making if all things happen according to someone else’s plan for me?
If you were born in the poorest place on earth, a fate that can’t be explained, and seemed destined to be on that certain moment, born in that specific time and place, then that mustn’t be an accident or coincidence, does that happen for a reason too? it doesn’t matter, right? because one way or the other you must find a way to find reasons to live through life because you were given life, an opportunity to breathe and experience human life, so in this case do we still believe that God planned all these in our life? that is a Yes or maybe a No an answer we should give reasons to it, because no one will ever give you answer to the enigmatic mysteries of life’s existence.
The idea of free will has led me to believe I am the master controller of my life, that no matter what happens to me I will still find my way back on track, and choose to correct the mistakes I’ve done in the past, not to alter the past though, but at least avoid making the same mistakes I’ve done before, but even if I try hard to avoid it, the results fall into the same category of errors, and sometimes even if you move to another place to forget everything from your past still encounters almost same people only with different faces but has the same motives of deceit, lies, and bitterness in them, well the thing here is people like that are everywhere, you can try to avoid making friends with them but they won’t disappear in the face of the earth, they are the spice of life’s chaos, well hey guess what? they chose to be an asshole, so to experience the same error of betrayal is most probably the result of poor decision-making.
But how egoistic of me to think I’m so special that God has a plan for me, that he puts me in this place because I have a specific purpose on Earth that is larger than my life, like who the f**k do I think I am? His Chosen one? I still believe things happen for a reason though, not because the Universe is watching over me and controls the events that will make sense in my everyday life, it happens for a reason because I am a human being has the ability to think and adapt and give reasons to the things happening to me or I will not make any sense to my life at all, everything happens base on what I made as a decision, influenced by time, weather, natural catastrophe, tragedy and other people’s decision towards the fact.
We can maneuver our way to the course we are heading to, and as a human with the ability to make our imagination come to life, then our rational mind can give meaning to the event we experience on a daily basis, though it may seem sometimes you have no control of what was happening or what has happened to your life good or bad the only reason possible is we give meaning to what seems to have none when it hits you, you can try to depend on that cliché to give yourself a reason to live for the next couple of days, weeks or maybe years, but that will not change the fact, that everything that is happening in our lives is just simultaneous effect of our decision.
If your life depends on the plan of some divine universe that you’re not certain if it’s gonna happen or not, then most probably you’ll be wasting your time waiting for your purpose you would’ve discovered yourself if you try to open your mind to all possibilities, remember things ain’t possible until you make it happened for your own reason.
©Eessangj October 2020